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Better communication skills will advance your career and business. Are you ready to enhance your understanding and results from better communication? Listen to learn how to deliver Your Intended Message. Are you willing to cross-examine communication from various perspectives? Would you like to deliver your intended message more effectively? Listen to Your Intended Message to gain a powerful advantage in your ability to convey your message to your audience, team, clients or marketplace. Learn from the mistakes and success of communication experts from around the world from different scenarios. Imagine what that means to you when you improve the success of your next conversation, presentation or message.
Episodes
Tuesday May 23, 2023
Tuesday May 23, 2023
Are you using or abusing the word VERY?
Here's a Weed Word to remove from your speaking
The Weed Words are words and phrases that can choke your intended message like nasty weeds. These short clips will highlight one word or phrase each week so you can remove these weeds from your speaking.
Episode 153
V E R Y
Stop using the word very because it is vague, lazy and deceptive.
Very is an adverb. That means its purpose is to modify an adjective, verb or other adverb. Adverbs have a broad range of work. Maybe that’s why they are often misused.
I’ve noticed that very shows up as the most overused and misused adverb.
That should be enough reason to stop using it.
When you use the word very, you are not standing out. You are simply repeating a word that too many people use and misuse.
Very is a lazy word. What do I mean? People use very when they are lazy. They can’t be bothered to search for a better word, so they say very.
It was very cold. Did you mean freezing or frigid?
It was very hot. Did you mean boiling or stifling?
I was very hungry. Did you mean famished?
It was a very slow. Did you mean sluggish?
It was very important. Did you mean crucial?
Just when you thought that the word very couldn’t be more abused, we are tormented with the phrase - very unique.
What does that mean?
Unique means one of a kind. Unlike any other. There’s nothing else like it.
There are no degrees of unique. No shades of gray. Simply one of a kind. Unique.
You can’t modify the word unique. It’s unique or it’s not.
It gets worse.
Have you heard very, very unique? That’s ridicules. It’s lazy talk and it’s a lie.
The mistake that people make is believing that adding the word very in front of their description makes it stronger. Instead, it makes it vague and weaker.
Are you smart or very smart?
Did you mean brilliant?
The word very is a vague expression of more. However, it’s not visual and it’s not measurable. It’s vague. It’s a lazy word choice.
We can’t see or feel it.
When you use the word very, you confuse your audience because they don’t know what you mean.
Instead select words that are clear, measurable or visual.
Beware of the Weed Words.
Listen to these Weed Word Alerts every week. Then listen to the latest episode where we explore aspects of business communication skills.
George Torok
Watch the Weed Word videos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahi1kt3n4g0&list=PLE0OVNUcJBI7KHEm4YyhhNQLuo10hUzjj
our host is George Torok
George is a specialist in executive communication skills. That includes conversation and presentation. He’s fascinated by way we communicate and influence behaviors. He delivers training and coaching programs to help leaders and promising professionals deliver the intended message for greater success.
Connect with George
www.SpeechCoachforExecutives.com
https://www.linkedin.com/in/georgetorokpresentations/
Thursday May 18, 2023
Thursday May 18, 2023
Ten ways you can use the pause in your presentation for greater impact
Why is the pause such a powerful tool yet abused
Episode 152:
In this episode George Torok examines the power of the pause and presents 10 reasons and examples to use in your presentation for greater success.
- Are you using the purpose on purpose to engage your audience?
- What lessons can you take from comedy about the pause?
- When are good times to insert the pause?
- How long should you pause?
- What if you pause by mistake?
- How can you embrace and enhance your comfort with the pause?
George Torok is a specialist in communication skills. He coaches executives to deliver their message more successfully. That might be in conversation or presentation.
Learn more about his programs and the results of his clients at
https://www.speechcoachforexecutives.com/
Get your weekly presentation tips at
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Excerpts from this episode:
The old cliché suggests that “Silence is Golden”. There are times when you might appreciate some silence in your life. On the other hand, silence can feel disquieting, disturbing and anxiety ridden.
When you are speaking to an audience you might consider silence the enemy or the sign of a bad presentation. Imagine that you get lost in your thoughts and stop speaking. You go silent and anguished while trying to recover and start speaking again. You might even feel that any noise is preferable to silence. That’s when the umms and ahhs escape your lips.
Don’t panic. Consider the positive benefits of pauses in your presentation. Even an unplanned pause can be perceived positively by the audience.
Many speakers would improve the power of their presentation if they inserted tactical pauses throughout their presentation. The ability to pause might be the most important technique that speakers need to learn. It might sound simple but like many simple lessons, it’s not easy.
It can be extremely difficult to pause when you are delivering a presentation. You might feel compelled to speak because you believe silence is the enemy. You perceive pausing as a sign of weakness. The reality is that silence could be your most powerful communication tool.
Perhaps you’re not convinced. That’s understandable. Consider these examples and reasons to pause during your presentation.
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Recapture Attention
It’s almost impossible to hold the attention of the audience throughout your presentation. You need to recapture their attention. Pausing is an effective way to do that. Simply look at the audience with a calm smile and say nothing for as long as it takes. That could be several seconds that feels like eons to you.
Invite Interaction
When you want the audience to speak you must allow them that silence to think and respond. When you want a response, ask a question and wait in silence for the first answer. Then prod the group for another opinion and wait.
Pausing while standing before your audience can feel horrendous, yet it might be the most powerful presentation technique for you to master.
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Tuesday May 16, 2023
Tuesday May 16, 2023
If I have you, how would you feel?
If you were had how would you feel?
What is gross about this phrase?
Welcome to Weed Words, the weekly micro tip on words to avoid so you can have more credibility when you speak.
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Thanks for having me
What do you feel or see when you hear this phrase? Thanks for having me.
I cringe. The visual associated with this phrase is yucky.
I hosted a radio show for 19 years and interviewed over 600 guests. I continue to interview guests on my podcast, Your Intended Message. Please tune in because it’s the podcast about communication in business. Your Intended Message.
Sometimes the guest says, thank you for having me.
Yuck, I didn’t have you.
There are two ways to interpret this phrase.
You were either - duped or eaten.
The past tense of have is had. If you were had, that usually means
you were cheated. I didn’t cheat you.
The other interpretation of have is eaten.
What did you have for lunch? A hamburger. It was delicious.
What did you have for dessert? A crème Brule.
Who did you have yesterday? That’s a relevant question for Hannibal Lector. Remember Hannibal the Cannibal.
He could answer, I had a census taker along with a nice chianti and fava beans.
I suppose that the ghost of that census taker could say, “Thank you for having me. Trust that I was delicious”
Stop saying thank you for having me. It’s gross.
Instead, you can say
Delighted to be on (name of program)
Thank you for the opportunity to talk to your audience about (the topic)
It was a pleasure to discuss how people can (benefit of the topic)
Thanks for inviting to speak to your audience on (name of program)
Thank you for the engaging conversation about (the topic)
Notice how these phrases are much more thoughtful, engaging and friendly.
Until I switch to the cannibal diet, I’m not going to have you. So please don’t say, thank you for having me.
Beware of the Weed Words
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Thursday May 11, 2023
Thursday May 11, 2023
Why doesn't sales and marketing play well together?
How can we get sales and marketing on the same team?
Episode 150 (Gary is based in Medellin, Columbia)
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Summary
- The importance of sales and marketing alignment. 0:00
- Three facts to know about Gary Garth
- There’s often a disconnect between sales and marketing. 2:14
- The disconnect between sales and marketing.
- How to solve the problem.
- How can one department contribute towards the other? How can we make sure that we’re speaking the same language? What kind of priorities can 4:24
- How one department can contribute to the other one.
- Best practices for sales and marketing.
- The importance of having sales and marketing as an army in the same front. 6:28
- Creating a chief revenue officer.
- Creating a weekly sales and marketing meeting.
- Why you need to understand your ideal customer profile from a sales and marketing standpoint. 8:43
- The 20 metrics sales and marketing should have locked down.
- Understanding the ideal customer profile.
- The first obstacle is creating awareness about the solution.
- The two different value propositions.
- What is the alignment between sales and marketing? How does it fit into the equation? 12:20
- Alignment between sales and marketing.
- Addressing the misalignment between marketing and sales.
- The third thing is to establish equal KPI. 14:35
- Aligning tools to make a tremendous impact.
- Establishing equal kpi.
- Practical examples of success for marketing and sales. 16:25
- Practical example, direct response marketing campaign.
- 70% of all leads come through phone calls.
- Sales and marketing each come with their own bias. Did you struggle with marketing people? 18:50
- Sales and marketing have their own biases.
- How to make sales and marketing work together.
- How to get your sales and marketing departments to work together. 21:20
- Marketing and sales need to be more open and willing to ask questions.
- The first step is collaboration.
- Aligning the two customer journeys.
- Step one, mapping out the entire customer journey.
About Gary Garth
Gary is a serial entrepreneur, founder and CEO of elevate.io. He's authored the zero to 100 million sales blueprint book, and the Goals Grit and Greatness Planner.
He's been featured in Inc, Forbes, Success and many other prominent publications as a serial entrepreneurs since 2002.
Gary has started and successfully exited six companies, including large outbound sales, call centres, radio advertising networks, and an award winning eight figure, digital marketing agency.
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Gary Garth's current projects include:
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Excerpts from this conversation with Gary Garth
That's, I guess that's the million dollar question here.
What I see in nine out of 10 scenarios, when I work with companies, the very first thing you can do to get an immediate assessment of how much collaboration there is between these two departments, how well they understand each other, and what areas of opportunity you can address is get them in a room together, and then had them both map out the entire customer journey.
So before they even become a customer, their prospect and that whole process to when they become a customer and understanding also, if you're looking at it from a as a as a business owner standpoint, their ability to cross sell, upsell products, collect testimonials, create case studies, how many referrals
Do you have understanding that whole process and aligning on all the different metrics? You will probably get one very clear picture from sales. And another picture for marketing.
So aligning those two customer journeys, less as and heavy one universal one will always tend to spark a lot opportunities because sometimes, the customer is continuously has communication with the account manager account executive in b2b, for example, but do they know exactly when to identify an upsell across an opportunity and how to promote it?
Could marketing for example, provide some content or collateral case studies, an ROI calculator that can demonstrate if you did x, y, z and expanded your service from Package A to B or added this or the product to the equation?
Here's the expected impact financially speaking as a result of that, all of a sudden, you'll see a lot of revenue opportunities.
So just mapping out the entire customer journey. That would be step number one.
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Tuesday May 09, 2023
Tuesday May 09, 2023
What does a bunch mean to you?
When you hear the word, what do you think?
When you say it, what do your listeners think?
Welcome to Weed Words, the weekly micro tip on words to avoid so you can have more credibility when you speak.
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Hey, I got a bunch. Do you want to buy a bunch? How many bunches do you want?
How excited do you get when you hear the word - bunch?
How do you think your clients or team feels when you talk - bunch talk?
Do you provide a bunch of products or services?
Are you proud of the bunch of options you offer to you clients?
Are you asking your team to generate a bunch of ideas?
What are you trying to say? What do you want people to think, see or feel when you say that?
What’s a bunch? Go ahead. Think of a bunch. What comes to mind?
Bananas. What else? Grapes, flowers
When you talk to monkeys how can you get them excited? Say “I’ve got a bunch for you.”
When you want to score with that attractive monkey, simply coo, “Come up to my place, I’ve got a bunch.”
When talking to humans about a bunch, they’ll recognize that you want to date monkeys.
Say bunch to humans, and they’ll think, Oh you’re not talking to me.
Let me introduce you to my monkey.
And don’t try to dress it up by calling it a whole bunch, a big bunch or bunches.
Instead, toss the bananas and find words that are clear and descriptive:
You provide an assortment of products or services.
You’re proud of the selection of options you offer.
You ask your team for a dozen ideas.
Be clear and descriptive.
Keep the bunch talk for monkey-tinder.
Beware of the weed words.
Listen to these Weed Word Alerts every week. Then listen to the latest episode where we explore aspects of business communication skills.
George Torok
Watch the Weed Word videos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahi1kt3n4g0&list=PLE0OVNUcJBI7KHEm4YyhhNQLuo10hUzjj
our host is George Torok
George is a specialist in executive communication skills. That includes conversation and presentation. He’s fascinated by way we communicate and influence behaviors. He delivers training and coaching programs to help leaders and promising professionals deliver the intended message for greater success.
Connect with George
Thursday May 04, 2023
Thursday May 04, 2023
Boost your productivity with less distractions
What if you delayed checking your messages for at least 20 minutes?
Episode 148 (Ann is based in Toronto, Canada)
In this conversation with Ann Gomez we explore:
- What is the warrior mentality and how can you apply it to your work?
- Why are distractions so addictive and so damaging?
- The conversation you need to have with yourself and then your team
- Why being brilliant and driven can work against you?
- Three challenges that overcomplicate our day and how to address them
- A hack to have shorter meetings and end on time
- The power of short bursts of focus
- Assessing the urgency and best channel for the message
About Ann Gomez:
Ann is the founding president of Clear Concept Inc., an international training organization. Her latest book is, Workday Warrior: A proven path to reclaiming your time.
For almost 20 years, Ann and her team have been training the world's busiest people to thrive at work.
Learn more about Ann and Clear Concept Inc, at
Learn more about her books at
https://clearconceptinc.ca/books/
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Excerpts from this conversation with Ann Gomez:
03:29
Okay. So the first step is to clarify what is most important, too many people are trying to do too many things. I was one of those people for many years.
So what I hear is people say, Oh, I have too many priorities, I don't have enough time to go around. And and it's true that most people are spreading themselves too thin.
And so this obviously is a conversation you'd want to have with your your team with your leader, to make sure you're all clear on the core priorities. But it's really important to know what your top priorities are and what your future priorities are.
And there's a difference here. There's a ton of great ideas out there. There's no end in sight of things we can spend our time on, we just need to define what are we doing now versus later.
And that later could be a week from now a month from now a year from now, like you decide what's appropriate for you.
But in terms of core priorities, there's a magic number of three, three core priorities.
And this is not discrete tasks. This is project so one of my core priorities is serving clients and that I dedicated about half of my week to serving clients. It's a big category of work.
And I often have many clients on the go all wrap up one project to take on another so it's not like it's one task. There's multiple tasks in that core priority.
Right leaders often have their team as another core priority. Sales and Marketing might have business development activities as part of their core priorities. And this is not just one task. It's a bucket of work. It's a category of work.
But when we think about our work in that way, we start to get more strategic But what we're saying yes to right now. So that's the first thing to be clear on your top priorities.
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05:43
So the second step is to combat this not enough time syndrome that so many of us have. And the strategy is to pay yourself first.
So once we know what our core priorities are, then we want to block that time in our calendar before other things get in the way.
So we've heard this concept, pay yourself first with financial resources. Now we're applying that same principle to our time, our limited resource, right? As you said, Can't make more time we get our 24 hours.
So how are we spending it. And so we want to be very proactive about building routines around our core priorities, and then leaving the leftovers for all of those other things.
So for example, protect focus work time, most of us need to have time for independent work that doesn't include email, chats, informal conversations, like independent work, to build a document, edit, and a spreadsheet, whatever that may be.
And so we want that time to be uninterrupted when our alerts are off, minimize email, minimize, chat, whatever it may be, close our door and focus.
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Tuesday May 02, 2023
Tuesday May 02, 2023
In my humble opinion
When you hear this phrase what do you think? How do you feel about the speaker? Are you eager to hear a humble opinion?
Do you feel that they are truly humble? Do you believe that their opinion is valid? Do you prepare yourself for a less than humble opinion? Do you think, Who asked for your opinion?
The words humble and opinion do not belong in the same sentence. Put them together and warning bells ring in our heads.
When I hear this phrase, the question that pops up is “Are you expressing your opinion or are you pretending to be humble?”
If you are truly humble, why are you expressing your opinion? A humble person doesn’t express an opinion. They keep their mouth shut.
I imagine that your humbleness doesn’t compare to the Dalia Lama. He doesn’t claim to be humble. He simply is. If you are humble, you don’t need to say it. We will recognize your humbleness by the way you speak and treat others.
So your claim to being humble is … what’s the word I’m searching for… weak, false, phony – a lie.
If you are humble why express your opinion?
If your opinion has value, why is it humble?
If your opinion is valid and is more than an opinion – why degrade it?
What I find curious and revealing is that this phrase doesn’t suggest that you are humble, instead it’s only this particular opinion that is humble. Other opinions might not be humble.
If your opinion is humble – don’t express it.
If you believe you must pretend to be humble because you don’t have faith in your opinion, shut up.
If you want your opinion to be taken seriously, don’t pretend to be humble and don’t call it an opinion.
Instead say, “Based on my experience…
Based on my research,
Based on my perspective
If you offer value, there’s no reason to fake humble. If your message is valuable, don’t give it crutches by calling it humble.
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Beware of the weed words.
Listen to these Weed Word Alerts every week. Then listen to the latest episode where we explore aspects of business communication skills.
George Torok
Watch the Weed Word videos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahi1kt3n4g0&list=PLE0OVNUcJBI7KHEm4YyhhNQLuo10hUzjj
our host is George Torok
George is a specialist in executive communication skills. That includes conversation and presentation. He’s fascinated by way we communicate and influence behaviors. He delivers training and coaching programs to help leaders and promising professionals deliver the intended message for greater success.
Connect with George
Friday Apr 28, 2023
Friday Apr 28, 2023
The mind of a scientist and the passion of an entrepreneur
How to get people to understand your message
Episode 146 (Hasan in based in Munich, Germany)
In this conversation with Hasan Ibne Akram we explore:
- Why does an engineer need to be a T shape communicator?
- How does a scientist talk to investors and get the money?
- How engineers and scientists can communicate with business executives
- Why is empathy critical to effective communication and less stress
- How to develop your empathy as a skill set
- Stories, analogies and authenticity oh my!
- Managing your perspective to change your world
About Hasan Akram:
Dr. Hasan is a serial entrepreneur. He is a computer scientist working in the domain of Autonomous Vehicle Safety. He is passionate about high performance.
He is the author of The Million Dollar Monk, which examines high performance.
Train your brain to overcome brain burn-out and leverage more of your brain's power with the use of science-based training programs.
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Excerpts from this conversation with Hasan Ibne Akram:
Another amazing person that I have really tried to learn from him, who is an amazing communicator, and a scientist Neil deGrasse Tyson.
Neil deGrasse, Tyson takes those concepts of physics, astrophysics, that you that only a handful of scientists will be able to read in their journals. And he sells it to everybody.
And that is an amazing way of communicating. The recent book that I'm almost done with, I'm about to publish is called a brief history of autonomous vehicle, because that's the domain I work in.
And I really try to follow Neil deGrasse Tyson, because the book is or everyone. And that's like communicating at that level. So that everybody understands, is really the name of the game.
Because there was one joke, somebody said that, you know, we have such a good professor coming in that he's so good that nobody will understand him.
But that's not a good professor, a good professor, is one that even the guests will understand everything.
Terrific reminder, interesting analogy. Yes, he's so good that no one will understand him. And that's not something that anyone wants to have said about themselves.
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I have to also train my people, don't give me the details, I only need three numbers because there are like 2000 things on my table. If I go to the details, there's no way I can.
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First. I would say empathize - empathy, empathy and empathy.
Empathy is really the key. Once you're able to empathize, the second part is if you're if you're a leader, you have to be precise.
And one very interesting thing that the difference between leader and a manager, your job is not to give a task of a leader.
A leaders job is to give a mission, and how can you articulate that mission and the vision with your team, and somehow li that mission and vision with their life mission and vision, using empathy?
That's the formula and a curious challenge for all leaders out there and definitely something worth working on.
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Tuesday Apr 25, 2023
Tuesday Apr 25, 2023
I just want to
When the person starts their talk with this phrase, how do you feel?
Whose interest are they speaking to? You or themself?
Does this make you feel valued?
Not me!
Why would you care what the speaker wants?
Why would the speaker believe you care what they want?
What would you listen to what they want?
The speaker isn’t talking for your benefit but for their own purpose.
It’s about what they want.
When you see this phrase in writing, often its proper English – I just want to
Notice there are three ts in that phrase.
What happens when the person speaks this phrase?
It mutates into I jus wanna
What was simply annoying, has become repulsive.
What happened to the letter t?
Why the street slang talk?
Why are they so lazy when speaking? Why is it so hard to enunciate the letter t?
I just wanna
How do you feel when you hear that phrase?
Do you feel special?
Do you feel that you are about to hear something profound?
Or are you already discounting what follows this gutter talk?
When I hear the word wanna – I’m reminded of guano. That’s bird poop.
The next time the speaker says, I jus wanna –
you might respond with “bird poop”. Now I know what you mean.
The easiest way to avoid sounding like poop, is to speak for the benefit of your listener and not for your self gratification.
We don’t care what you wanna.
Beware of the Weed Words.
Listen to these Weed Word Alerts every week. Then listen to the latest episode where we explore aspects of business communication skills.
George Torok
Watch the Weed Word videos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahi1kt3n4g0&list=PLE0OVNUcJBI7KHEm4YyhhNQLuo10hUzjj
What are your suggestions for weed words?
Listen to these Weed Word Alerts every week. Then listen to the latest episode where we explore aspects of business communication skills.
George Torok
Watch the Weed Word videos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahi1kt3n4g0&list=PLE0OVNUcJBI7KHEm4YyhhNQLuo10hUzjj
our host is George Torok
George is a specialist in executive communication skills. That includes conversation and presentation. He’s fascinated by way we communicate and influence behaviors. He delivers training and coaching programs to help leaders and promising professionals deliver the intended message for greater success.
Connect with George
www.SpeechCoachforExecutives.com
https://www.linkedin.com/in/georgetorokpresentations/
Thursday Apr 20, 2023
Thursday Apr 20, 2023
Why is sustainable leadership critical to team success?
What is the science of effective leadership?
Episode 144 (Niels is based in London, England)
In this conversation with Niels Brabrandt, we explored:
- What is the science behind effective leadership?
- Why leaders must discard silly motivation phrases
- What are the tools of sustainable leadership and hence sustainable teams
- What is the difference between transactional and transformational world?
- Why is the role of an opinion critical to the team?
- How to lead in the hybrid workplace
About Niels Brabandt:
He successfully built and sold a business, so he speaks from real-world experience regarding leadership.
Unlike others, he did the scientific research on leadership which means that he has proof and evidence for his claims.
Niels not only practiced leadership in business but also in sports: he was a professional football (soccer) referee for decades.
Learn more about Niels and his programs at
Connect with Niels at
https://www.linkedin.com/in/nielsbrabandt/
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Excerpts from this conversation with Niels Brabandt:
Yeah, sustainable teams are part of that definitely a different team phase, which are probably known however, many people only connect sustainability to aspects like the environment or recycling and that is not the only aspect we need to talk about.
It's about employee retention. It is about focusing on your employees. But most importantly, we need people who know their craft, do a podcast as you do here without doing the research, how to do the tech how to do the audio, the video, the lighting, however, we often have people who became leaders basically either because someone else quit and they were promoted, or someone else thought they are a good leader and they will just pick or unfortunately quite often based on their network.
I don't want to pull out cronyism and nepotism here however in many cases people became leader because other people said I like you I know you and here you are with your leadership job if you do not know the scientific background if you do not know the tools, and I do not mean opinions.
I mean proper scientifically proven tools if you do not know them, there's no chance you can be a good leader some people have a bit more talent maybe a bit more empathy, a bit more approach to it naturally but that will not work in the long run.
You still need the proper tools and scientific evidence tells you if something works or not. No motivational or inspirational one line ever paid the rent or made a team go the extra mile for longer than probably 24 hours.
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The leader has to figure out because sometimes people don't know about these concepts, transactional transformation, and they don't have to know it's the leaders job to know that they have to figure out who in my team is transactional, who in my team is transformational.
Because we have a certain effect, which unfortunately, effect recruiting, people like to recruit people who are exactly like themselves. It's called isomorphism, ISO Greek for equal more for parents.
So when someone is exactly like you, you prefer to work together with them. However, when you are a transformational leader, you have a transactional job to give away, you hire a person who prefers to work transformation, because they are just like you.
They probably quit within the first couple of months, because they will say, look, I was looking for something where I have time on my own, and I can decide and steer people and lead people, you basically gave me a repetitive task to do every single day that's complete.
So it's very important, the leader has to figure out who is transactional, and who is transformational.
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